“Tears for Queers is not really my kind of shit” – Muammar Gaddafi.
I can’t live if living is without you.
May we suggest you join us on Twitter in that case @tearsforqueers
Who are these Tears for Queers?
Not content with pioneering keyhole surgery, inventing the sequin and directly saving at least 217 lives, Tears for Queers have built up a reputation as a ferocious force for good on the international party circuit.
Technically deficit but overflowing with love, Tears for Queers are the sound of a brighter dawn. A future where vest and shorts are all year wear, a future where crowds dance together with sweat in their eyes and joy on their lips. A future where the next finger buffet is only ever minutes away and the global national anthem is the theme from The Golden Girls.
When does this musical extravaganza happen?
Tears for Queers can be found the 1st Friday of every month in notorious homo hotspot The George and Dragon on Hackney Road in London from 8pm until about we are made to stop around midnight. We will probably go wherever else you invite us too.
I must speak with you immediately!
Sadly, that is not possible but please do email: email@example.com
Behold! It’s a tapa of Tears for Queers classics:
Old soul: Nutbush City Limits by Tina Turner, Tainted Love by Gloria Jones, Reach Out by The Four Tops, Nothing but a Heartache by The Flirtations, Something’s Got a Hold on Me by Etta James.
Standing on a table screaming the words , heart-tearing power ballads: Listen by Alexandra Burke & Beyonce live on the X-Factor, Without You by Mariah Carey, Total Eclipse of the Heart by Bonnie Tyler.
Dancing on the table wild pop hits: Proud Mary by Tina Turner, Holding Out for a Hero by Bonnie Tyler, Bad Romance by Lady Gaga, Only Girl in the World by Rihanna, Like a Prayer by Madonna, All I Want for Christmas is You by Mariah Carey, The theme tune to the Golden Girls.
Relatively new R&B: Family Affair by Mary J Blige, Shackles by Mary Mary, Shoop by Salt & Pepper, Creep by TLC, Million Dollar Bill by Whitney.
Sort of 90s dance: Ride on Time by Black Box , You Sure Do by Strike, You’ve Got to Show Me Love by Robyn S, Such a Good Feeling by Brothers in Rhythm,, Theme from S’Express.
Sexually ambiguous disco: Cherchez Pas by Madleen Kane, Give a Little Hmm to Me by Amanda Lear, New Attitude by Patti Labelle, Groove Me by Fern Kinney.
Rock is a shite word but: You Shook Me All Night Long by AC/DC, Dancing in the Dark by Bruce Springsteen, Send Me a Postcard by Shocking Blue, Ca Plane Pour Moi by Plastic Bertrand, I Heard It Through the Grapevine by The Slits.
Favourite covers: I Think We’re Alone Now by Lene Lovich, I Want To Break Free by Monica Cervera, Chica Material by Byanka, What A Man by Linda Lyndell, Evil Gal Blues by Aretha Franklin, Bang Bang by Dalida.