Monthly Archives: May 2011

Ugandan MP calls for Eurovision viewers to be force-fed windmachines

Tears for Queers Eurovision Scorecard 2011

Rice and Carola: pop lovers and wind machines have inalienable rights.

Tears for Queers are leading global opposition to the latest legislative outrage targeting homos and lovers of low brow pop in Uganda . The “Bill to Stop Anal Intrusion through Transcontinental Good Evening Europe Music Bumfest” calls for any Ugandans caught watching Eurovision to be force fed a wind machine. Wind machines are a key feature in around 84% of all performances in the famous song contest.

Local groups in Uganda bravely led opposition to the proposed legislation. Their campaign reached an international audience this week though as global party sensation Tears for Queers brought together a powerful coalition of world leaders and Eurovision legends to fight the Bill.

Condoleezza Rice made a long awaited return to the political arena to stand alongside Carola, winner of the contest for Sweden in 1991. In a joint statement on the steps of the UN headquarters in New York, the formidable pair called on Ugandans to reject the Bill, citing “the inalienable rights of pop lovers and wind machines to celebrate Eurovision in peace”.

Sandra Kim and Nancy Reagan appeared on the The Gayle King show.

In a separate event, Sandra Kim, the 1986 winner, appeared on the Gayle King show with Nancy Reagan.

To encourage peaceful defiance of the Bill, Tears for Queers have published their annual scorecard which can be downloaded for free. They are encouraging as many people as possible to download the scorecard and revel in Eurovision’s unique magic unbowed by fear, ridicule or oppression. Eurovision takes place this Saturday, 14 May.

Tears for Queers Eurovision Scorecard 2011

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Tears for Queers refuse to rule out Hilary Clinton DJ debut at George & Dragon this Friday

Clinton - her spontaneous rap at the assassination of Bin Laden impressed military leaders.

Speculation that US Secretary of State and dancehall legend Hilary Clinton will make her DJ debut at homo-hotspot The George and Dragon continues to grow.   It is rumoured that Clinton will join party powerhouse Tears for Queers at the infamous Hackney fagpit this Friday.

Tears for Queers, currently supporting pro-democracy protests in Syria, refused to deny the rumours.  A source close to Clinton revealed however that the Secretary of State has earned admiration across Congress for her inspirational reggae beats.  “Whenever we get together to shake our hoops, its always Hils who gets the party started”, said the historic political rival.  Watching the recent assassination of Osama Bin Laden live alongside the President, Clinton burst in to a spontaneous dancehall rap that drew widespread praise from military bigwigs.

Tears for Queers play every first Friday of the month from 8pm-12ish at The George and Dragon, 2-4 Hackney Road, London E2 7NS.